What Did You Say?? 👂🏼(How's Your Hearing?)
And how are you addressing any hearing loss? An open thread.
Readers,
Recently I went for a walk with a friend who’s fifteen years older, and when I asked “So, what’s new?” she exclaimed, “I got hearing aids! And I love them!”
She proceeded to pull back her hair and show me the very tiny device in one of her ears. She seemed so proud of them, and of herself for surrendering to the need for them; she admitted she’d been resistant, but caved after she realized her grandchildren had been making fun of her behind her back for not hearing some of what they said.
It made me think about the shame wrongfully associated with every aspect of aging, including aging-related hearing loss. Part of the impetus behind my creating Oldster was that I’ve never understood why, in our culture, it’s customary to make fun of people for getting older — why the majority of birthday cards tease recipients for what, adding another year to their lives?? I sincerely don’t get it.
But anyway, back to hearing loss. Advances in medicine have us living longer with the same old ears. And advances in technology have led to all kinds of innovations in hearing aids, and cochlear implants. (Apple ear buds can now even be used to address hearing issues.) Sounds like a win-win!
Still, there are some elders in my midst who are resistant toward getting them. I thought I’d reach out to all of you to find out whether you are experiencing aging-related hearing loss, and how you’re addressing it. In the comments, tell me:
How old are you? Are you experiencing aging-related hearing loss? If so, how are you dealing with it? Do you have shame associated with your hearing loss? Have you gotten hearing aids? If so, were you resistant toward getting them? Do you recommend the hearing aids you have?
Me? Despite having been exposed to too much loud live music in my 30s — when I was covering bands and music venues, and doing gossip reporting in noisy nightclubs — my hearing is possibly a little too good. In my late 50s I’ve become a very light sleeper, woken nightly not only by ~someone’s~ snoring, but sometimes even just his breathing. (I recently invested in a pair of QuietOn noise-canceling ear buds to help with this.)
But judging by how my joints and eyes are progressing, I anticipate some aging-related hearing loss not too far down the pike. (By the way, for all those who responded to my January 12th open thread on joint pain: next week I’ll get a cortisone shot in my sacroiliac joint, the first in a long list of procedures my orthopedist and I are going to try, toward alleviating my chronic hip and lower back pain.)
I have several younger friends who are hard of hearing, who wear hearing aids. Check out my interview with Jennifer Pastiloff from a couple of years ago, about her progressive hearing loss that began when she was very young, and the hearing aids that work for her:
According to a New York Times article from last May, factors like exposure to loud music and listening frequently through ear buds are leading more young people to require hearing aids. Maybe if more young people get them, it will dissipate some of the stigma around wearing them, and around progressive hearing loss, in general. Here’s hoping…
Okay once more for the people in the back row 🗣:
How old are you? Are you experiencing aging-related hearing loss? If so, how are you dealing with it? Do you have shame associated with your hearing loss? Have you gotten hearing aids? If so, were you resistant toward getting them? Do you recommend the hearing aids you have?
Incidentally, this is the 501st Oldster Magazine post! Will Hermes’ Oldster Magazine Questionnaire from earlier this week was the 500th post. Thank you all for being a part of this exploration of aging with me, and a part of this supportive, growing community. Extra special thanks to those who have become paid subscribers. I couldn’t do this without all of you. 🙏
Here’s to the next 500 posts…starting with this one.
-Sari
I'm 71. For a few years, I noticed that I asked people to repeat themselves with increasing frequency. There seemed to be more mumbling going on. I had my hearing checked and was told I had mild age-related loss. Hearing aids could help. But I resisted. Turning 70 had come with a different struggle, something I'd never experienced around birthdays before. Adding hearing aids to my shifting self identity felt like too much. A tangible acknowledgement of my aging. So I kept complaining about mumbling and saying "what did you say?" way too often. It was being asked by a teacher to facilitate a book discussion during a writing retreat that pushed me over the edge. I knew I'd never be able to hear the comments of the 30 participants. Reluctantly, I returned to the audiologist. Reluctantly, I paid for expensive hearing aids. Reluctantly, I started to wear them, newly grateful for my curly hair that provided cover. And then I started to hear again. The beeping sound my car made when I backed up Bird songs. The creakings of my house. And yes, the voices of the discussion participants. I love my hearing aids. I can listen to audio books through them! And I've started talking about them. Finding others who think there's lots of mumbling going on. Texting me later to ask what brand I wear.
I am 87+ years old. I got my hearing aids at 80 before I went into the Peace Corps. Folks wear glasses, braces on our teeth, use a cane..I am confused why wearing hear aids should be avoided. Not only can I hear my coworkers better, I can hear birds singing and the wind blowing and the trees rustling. May we age with dignity and enjoy hearing our grand children's laughter.