"I am realizing that I've never shared my age publicly until this interview. I can’t imagine doing so had I still been working in the corporate world."
Dear Yi: Grace. You have it in spades. Must be your mother. You're the kind of person it must be lovely to age alongside of. I said good-bye to my mother just after her 89th birthday. She'd had enough, but she, too, had found grace. Even dignity. I'm still trying to get there. You are an inspiration.
Thank you Peggy for your kind words! You said GRACE. Along with joy, grace has been on the top of my Intention List since I bowed out of the corporate rat race. I want to restore joy and grace in me :). We are inspiration for each other, that's how the world should be :).
I am in California with my mom this week and I have just completed a long essay about love, the love my mom has of her music, and the love we have for each other. I want to write about it while she can still read it and respond to it.
I got to know Yi over substack and then we met in person, she’s beautiful inside and out with a young heart. I especially admire her for her passion in writing, music and food. 👍
Loved this, and highly recommend Yi's Substack. It's interesting (to me) that the question I most look forward to seeing answered by Sari's respondents is the last one, about birthdays. Such a range of answers! I identify with Yi's -- not a birthday girl, but appreciating being remembered by loved ones.
I enjoyed this interview thoroughly. It's wonderful to get to know you here, Yi. When you said: "Being an Asian woman, I have been told many times that I don’t look my age." Ah, I can resonate with that! I also felt a sense of ambivalence when I heard that comment. While it may be a compliment, I often found that my "youthful" look deprived me of a sense of authority that comes with age. As my hair started to turn a bit gray and my youthful features started to fade, I actually feel a greater sense of ease. The pressure of keeping up with that youthful look is no longer there, and I enjoy the greater congruence between how I feel inside and how I look outside, LOL!
Your description of your relationship with your mother is very touching. There's so much tenderness. It always warms my heart to hear about good mother-daughter relationships among the Chinese, because I haven't enjoyed that all my life and have wondered how it's possible to have a "normal" one. You've had an amazing life path and I hope you continue to write and express your creative talent.
Hello Louisa! Thanks for your thoughts! I have been reading your writings and see a lot of similarity in our backgrounds. I also sensed the differences in some of our experiences, especially with our parents. I hope it is not presumptuous for me to say that I believe underneath the dissimilarities lie similarities that's deeply rooted in our culture. Happy to explore more with you if so inclined.
Hi Yi, thanks for reading my essays. It is very likely that we share many similarities in our experiences because of our common culture. It fascinates me how certain traumatic political events affected people in vastly different ways, in part due to their own family upbringing, their temperaments and personalities. Would definitely like to explore this with you!
I love every bit of this interview. So very wise and thoughtful, especially your feelings about age and the use of the word “old.” Never use the word myself, as I just don’t think of myself in that way.
And I was very inspired by the incredible vision of your mom. What a strong influence she must be for you.
Yi, thank you for sharing that you are with your mom and have done writing to share with her. She will treasure hearing it and you will treasure the memory of having read it aloud to her for the rest of your life. As for grace, it is a practice. Each time we find grace in the moment, we get closer to attaining it for all of our moments. Joy as well. You are on your way!!!!!
I am glad I stumbled on this interview and this publication. Yi - your thoughtful responses inspire peace. Thank you. Now mellowed with age, I consider how to share experiences, without arrogance or dismissiveness, but so they are heard in the intended good faith. Writing is that way, and attached is one example. Enjoy if so inclined...
I loved the thoughtful responses, and I am going to check out Yi's Substack too. Age is so fluid, and your age in your head on any given day may vary quite often from your chronological age. I also wouldn't be the first to mention that "old" is relative to your current age. When I was in my 20s, I dated a man who had subtly concealed his age from me for quite a while – he was 13 years older at 38 and when he finally revealed his age, suddenly he seemed like he belonged to a different world. When I was 40, mid-50s sounded like the first step into "old", and it goes on from there...now though, at 68, I think about friends who are 10, 15, or more years older, and I worry that the next time I see or speak with them could be the last, though of course, anything can happen to anyone at any time. There is just an awareness at this point that there is much more time behind than in front, so no day is "just another day" to me.
I have a friend who is 10 years older than me. She told me once that she thought I was so young when she was 50 and I was 40; then the same when she was 60 and I was 50 ... And then all of sudden it hit her: I would always be young to her! lol
We are always young to our future self, and when we are with people who love us, we can celebrate everyday! ❤
Thank you Sari and Yi Xue for this interview. I loved it so much. I am at a place in my life where I am thirsty for role models like your mother (I'm 57) because I don't want to follow in the footsteps of my own mom.
I appreciate you have stages in your life, roll along based on how you feel rather than a number (I'm going to shift my focus to that) and I especially love that you want to be a calmer version of your younger self! That is also my goal.
P.S. Also I love, so much, that you sponsored a quartet❤ What an amazing thing to do, bravo!
Donna, I am very blessed with role models in my life! I was also very fortunate to have my professor at UNL, Mr. and Dr. Ravnan to be my sponsor before I even set foot in this country. The quartet was formed in his name to honor him and his wife. Paying forward is what I can do and I hope he is smiling down on me!
Dear Yi: Grace. You have it in spades. Must be your mother. You're the kind of person it must be lovely to age alongside of. I said good-bye to my mother just after her 89th birthday. She'd had enough, but she, too, had found grace. Even dignity. I'm still trying to get there. You are an inspiration.
Thank you Peggy for your kind words! You said GRACE. Along with joy, grace has been on the top of my Intention List since I bowed out of the corporate rat race. I want to restore joy and grace in me :). We are inspiration for each other, that's how the world should be :).
I am in California with my mom this week and I have just completed a long essay about love, the love my mom has of her music, and the love we have for each other. I want to write about it while she can still read it and respond to it.
I got to know Yi over substack and then we met in person, she’s beautiful inside and out with a young heart. I especially admire her for her passion in writing, music and food. 👍
Thanks Janice! I am the fortunate one to be able to develop true friendship with one of my most enthusiastic readers! :)
Loved this, and highly recommend Yi's Substack. It's interesting (to me) that the question I most look forward to seeing answered by Sari's respondents is the last one, about birthdays. Such a range of answers! I identify with Yi's -- not a birthday girl, but appreciating being remembered by loved ones.
Dear Bette! Thanks for being a link-minded reader! I will celebrate birthday, or any day, with you!
I’m the same Bette. The last few years I’ve tried to create my own special birthday.
I enjoyed this interview thoroughly. It's wonderful to get to know you here, Yi. When you said: "Being an Asian woman, I have been told many times that I don’t look my age." Ah, I can resonate with that! I also felt a sense of ambivalence when I heard that comment. While it may be a compliment, I often found that my "youthful" look deprived me of a sense of authority that comes with age. As my hair started to turn a bit gray and my youthful features started to fade, I actually feel a greater sense of ease. The pressure of keeping up with that youthful look is no longer there, and I enjoy the greater congruence between how I feel inside and how I look outside, LOL!
Your description of your relationship with your mother is very touching. There's so much tenderness. It always warms my heart to hear about good mother-daughter relationships among the Chinese, because I haven't enjoyed that all my life and have wondered how it's possible to have a "normal" one. You've had an amazing life path and I hope you continue to write and express your creative talent.
Hello Louisa! Thanks for your thoughts! I have been reading your writings and see a lot of similarity in our backgrounds. I also sensed the differences in some of our experiences, especially with our parents. I hope it is not presumptuous for me to say that I believe underneath the dissimilarities lie similarities that's deeply rooted in our culture. Happy to explore more with you if so inclined.
Hi Yi, thanks for reading my essays. It is very likely that we share many similarities in our experiences because of our common culture. It fascinates me how certain traumatic political events affected people in vastly different ways, in part due to their own family upbringing, their temperaments and personalities. Would definitely like to explore this with you!
Beautiful!
I love every bit of this interview. So very wise and thoughtful, especially your feelings about age and the use of the word “old.” Never use the word myself, as I just don’t think of myself in that way.
And I was very inspired by the incredible vision of your mom. What a strong influence she must be for you.
Thanks so much Yi Xue. And to Sari also.
Thank you CeCe for your kind words! Old or not, I would like to think it has nothing to do with age :)
Thanks for loving the brief description of my mom. I have just written a 4000-word version and hoping to get it published soon!
I truly hope that happens for you. Such a gift you have!
Yi, thank you for sharing that you are with your mom and have done writing to share with her. She will treasure hearing it and you will treasure the memory of having read it aloud to her for the rest of your life. As for grace, it is a practice. Each time we find grace in the moment, we get closer to attaining it for all of our moments. Joy as well. You are on your way!!!!!
I am glad I stumbled on this interview and this publication. Yi - your thoughtful responses inspire peace. Thank you. Now mellowed with age, I consider how to share experiences, without arrogance or dismissiveness, but so they are heard in the intended good faith. Writing is that way, and attached is one example. Enjoy if so inclined...
https://open.substack.com/pub/joelelorentzen/p/teach-your-children?r=1p5p1m&utm_campaign=post&utm_medium=web
Thank you Joel, and I am glad I clicked the link above and read a couple of your writings. Now you have me as a reader going forward! :)
Great interview!
I loved the thoughtful responses, and I am going to check out Yi's Substack too. Age is so fluid, and your age in your head on any given day may vary quite often from your chronological age. I also wouldn't be the first to mention that "old" is relative to your current age. When I was in my 20s, I dated a man who had subtly concealed his age from me for quite a while – he was 13 years older at 38 and when he finally revealed his age, suddenly he seemed like he belonged to a different world. When I was 40, mid-50s sounded like the first step into "old", and it goes on from there...now though, at 68, I think about friends who are 10, 15, or more years older, and I worry that the next time I see or speak with them could be the last, though of course, anything can happen to anyone at any time. There is just an awareness at this point that there is much more time behind than in front, so no day is "just another day" to me.
I have a friend who is 10 years older than me. She told me once that she thought I was so young when she was 50 and I was 40; then the same when she was 60 and I was 50 ... And then all of sudden it hit her: I would always be young to her! lol
We are always young to our future self, and when we are with people who love us, we can celebrate everyday! ❤
Thank you Sari and Yi Xue for this interview. I loved it so much. I am at a place in my life where I am thirsty for role models like your mother (I'm 57) because I don't want to follow in the footsteps of my own mom.
I appreciate you have stages in your life, roll along based on how you feel rather than a number (I'm going to shift my focus to that) and I especially love that you want to be a calmer version of your younger self! That is also my goal.
P.S. Also I love, so much, that you sponsored a quartet❤ What an amazing thing to do, bravo!
Donna, I am very blessed with role models in my life! I was also very fortunate to have my professor at UNL, Mr. and Dr. Ravnan to be my sponsor before I even set foot in this country. The quartet was formed in his name to honor him and his wife. Paying forward is what I can do and I hope he is smiling down on me!