26 Comments
Nov 16, 2022Liked by Sari Botton, Scout Colmant

Thank you for this. The 80's were brutal. xo.

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They were! And they were exciting too, somewhere, was it just the ads? But somehow out of reach for so many of us. And for too many people, the 80s have never ended ... you're my musical hero so thank you so much for reading my essay❤️

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Still recovering from the 80s. <3

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Nov 16, 2022Liked by Sari Botton, Scout Colmant

Right?!

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Nov 16, 2022Liked by Sari Botton, Scout Colmant

Scout, I just wrote a memoir about growing up lesbian in Texas during the sixties and seventies so I get this. I became a cheerleader, sorority girl and debutante, trying not to disappoint my parents. Thank you for your beautiful words and thanks to Sari Botton for publishing it.

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Nov 16, 2022·edited Nov 16, 2022Author

I bet you and I could have a LOT to talk about! I'm thrilled you wrote a memoir about your experiences. We've experienced so much progress in such a short amount of time, but our dark ages are very recent history, too. Sari is amazing for creating this platform - we're all so lucky!

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Nov 16, 2022·edited Nov 16, 2022Liked by Sari Botton, Scout Colmant

Beautifully written! You unravel your story with great eloquence and empathy—two qualities that I think society needs more of these days. I look forward to reading more of what you write!

PS: I live in Europe, where the situation for gays is much easier—not perfect, but since this continent’s history is full of characters who never fit the norm, being gay is much more of an accepted part of the human spectrum.

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Thank for you for reading my essay! And I didn't mention it, but my semester in Copenhagen in college was a definite turning point for me. It was the first time I saw the world outside the US, outside my stifling hometown and it was so incredibly liberating. People were simply themselves, and everyone felt pretty free in 1990. It gave me a lot of hope!

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Nov 16, 2022Liked by Sari Botton, Scout Colmant

A WONDERFUL COMMENTARY SCOUT

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Thank you, Gregory! I really appreciate your kind words.

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Nov 16, 2022Liked by Scout Colmant

OF COURSE SCOUT

THINKING OF RUSSELL MY 2ND BEST FRIEND THE LAST 2 YEARS OF UNDERGRAD

HE CAME OUT IN 1969 AT THE TIME OF STONEWALL

A BRAVE THING TO DO AT THAT TIME

MANY OF OUR CLASSMATES ....ALMOST ALL PROGRESSIVES

DID NOT QUITE KNOW HOW TO DEAL WITH IT

ELMIRA MY #1 FRIEND AND I WERE A ROCK OF SUPPORT FOR RUSS

SHE AND I MARRIED IN 1970 AND LATER DIVORCED

RUSS DIED IN SAN LUIS OBISPO 2 YEARS AGO - PANCREATIC CANCER

WE WERE IN TEARS THE LAST TIME I SAW HIM

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Nov 16, 2022Liked by Sari Botton, Scout Colmant

Thank you. How this essay resonates . And I'm so glad you've claimed your life and are sharing it.

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Thank you for reading this, and I'm so glad to hear it resonates with you. My hope is it will resonate with anyone that feels like an outsider and alone, and offers some hope, too, that you're not alone at all - we're all here rooting for each other to make it!

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Nov 16, 2022Liked by Sari Botton, Scout Colmant

Such a beautiful piece. Thank you for sharing your story, Scout. You're a fantastic writer.

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Thank you so much! And thank you for reading it. This is such an inspiring community I'm glad to have found!

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Nov 16, 2022Liked by Sari Botton, Scout Colmant

Scout! This was such a beautiful essay! I'm not ever really surprised, but always saddened, to hear of more instances of LGTBQ+ folks dividing and conquering OURSELVES, within our shared community, whether it's treating queer media far more harshly than we treat mainstream/cis-het media, or ragging on someone for coming out later in life, or whatever else we use to dismantle our own house. I can be as guilty as anyone of these actions and attitudes, but I hope I always course-correct back to inclusion and compassion.

This essay was a joy to read, even the parts recounting hardness and loss, and I'm going to add Bros to my TBW list. I'd missed the discourse around it (one of the many perks of being moderately-to-minimally online), but this essay has set me up to enjoy it, I think. Scout, you sound awesome, I wish I could buy you a drink and hang out with you!

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Thanks so much for taking the time to read my essay and for your thoughtful response! Yeah, I really don't get the infighting part - I always want to be there for someone else whose figuring out their way. And I feel like everyone knows what it's like to "come out" of an inauthentic life, whether it's acknowledging your identity, or a marriage that doesn't work, or a job that's no longer you, or a life that just doesn't fit. And people, when were being broken open, need love, and support and compassionate listening. Judgment is so so so lame and such a waste of energy. I want anyone going through an important transition to not waste a second of energy on shame, and just feel hope, and know better days will be yours beyond the clouds. Even when it's difficult, it's so so worth it! I hope we get that drink one day, I really do!!! Thank you, once again.

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Nov 16, 2022Liked by Sari Botton, Scout Colmant

Wow! What stunning writing! You, sir, are a master of words. I loved reading your story; you helped me understand what must’ve been the hell of your difficult pre-out life. Take care. 💜

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Thank you! It can feel scary to put yourself out there, especially admitting, yep I sure do have regrets, and your kindness and your kudos really means a lot!

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Nov 17, 2022Liked by Scout Colmant

Wonderfully written and thanks for sharing this.

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Thank YOU for reading my essay, and offering your support!

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Nov 17, 2022Liked by Scout Colmant

A beautiful essay, Scout! You are such a talented writer❤️

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Oh shucks - thanks so much! I really appreciate the support and thanks for reading my essay!

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Nov 16, 2022Liked by Scout Colmant

Thank you for sharing this, Scout! <3

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Thank you, friend!

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I'm a straight female. I can't comment on this piece from a personal stance. The problem with Eichner is he has always been obnoxious, he doesn't appeal to everyone. Making the failure of his movie to make a lot of money a straight person problem was dumb. Did NPH have problems getting people to watch his new show? I binged it in a couple of days, it was immediately renewed. People watch what they like. And I don't understand the comments about trans women in sports. That's not a boogie man issue that "liberals" got infected with. If a swimmer with an adam's apple and penis who swam on the male team 2 years earlier, comes to the woman's team and wins races as a she that she never won as a he, people are seeing something is clearly off. Competitive sex segregated sports have nothing to do with gay rights.

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