Are there pills for Sophophoria? Write me a prescription immediately, please. Everything has so many steps. So many instructions. May I go lie down now, please? Thank you for this comic strip. Where does the local meeting for Sophophorics Anonymous meet? Oh, wait, I also hate groups, and meetings of any kind.
I love meetings, they give me an opportunity to talk to people. They all have a story to tell and the older the person the more interesting they have more to tell. It's amazing the diversity, talking to all people from all walks of life and from all over the world. Perhaps I'm just a nosy old git. But at my age why should I care. I've nothing to prove they either accept me for what I am or go off and talk to some other moron.
What is the opposite of sophophobia? I had to look it up and each time I googled different phrases, OCD kept popping up as the top definition.
I have the opposite problem: a compulsion to constantly try new things, and let me tell you, as I age it has become more exhausting each year not only for me but the people in my life. So my focus the last year has been to stay the course and stop allowing new things aka shiny objects to distract me.
I didn't think about this as an OCD thing, but now it's starting to make sense. Approaching 60 this year my brain and body are desperately trying to tell me "Please, stop. Please slow down and nourish what you have. You don't need anything. Everything you are looking for is on the other side of slowing down."
I really like this comment. Those shiny things I thought I really needed in my late 50's and 60's are now sitting in my jewelry box. And my fabric compulsion. Thank God for pillow covers you can order for cheap online or my closets would be full of pillows. Variety without clutter because I love to change things up in the house. I'm 72, now the garden and growing things are my focus.The closets are full. I'm in the process of wearing all of my old teaching clothes while I garden just to get the use out of them lol. The shoes have been replaced by flip flops. I still can't bear to sit too long, I need to learn to sit quietly and relax. That is unbelievably hard to do.
What you need is to learn how to be lazy. Laziness gets such a bad rap, but I can't tell you the number of times it's saved me from doing stupid things.
Absolutely live your best life at any age. Late 60’s😊I find that I am loving new things and have no fear in learning. However procrastination is my super power…
This is the problem I have, too. I want to try everything! This is ADHD! Once I was diagnosed last year, and learned that this is a common symptom of ADHD in women, I felt so much better. I no longer feel bad about trying and, sometimes, stopping. I'm enjoying switching things up. It's been all about the language for me. I tell myself, hmm this is starting to feel samey so I'll put it aside for a while and do this other thing. It's good for my curiosity.
Starting to feel shamey...I love that! I'm working on completing the shitty first draft of my novel this year, and that's been the hardest part, staying the course even when it feels samey.
But I've also completed some monumental goals in my life, so intellectually I know that's where the gold is. Once I switched up my diet, became more conscious of how foods make me feel, and started paying more attention to my energy levels and different times of day, I realized how hard I'd been pushing for so long.
I know this post was supposed to be about fear but I think it’s so brave to post “beginner” work in a discipline that’s well outside of your comfort zone.
I started taking improv classes a year ago. I’m a very silly person and expected (stupidly) to be pretty good at it. Turns out, it’s fucking hard! I have bombed a million times. Sometimes I leave class wondering why I continue to do this. But I keep going back. I have no plans to do anything practical with it. The joy is in the learning. And every now and then I have a great night and it’s the best!
Yesss!! I took my first improv class nearly 5 years ago at 48. I was “bit” by about the third class when I let go in a scene and stopped thinking. Always trying to get to that magical place.
And!! I agree with everything you said here. It is hard! Five years in I still mostly feel like a beginner and prefer rehearsal to shows. Truthfully, shows are rarely perfect. That’s the beauty of this form. Like who cares? It’s usually gone in a breath when next scene starts.
I’m thinking of Sari sharing her imperfect comic and it’s making me feel braver to share my imperfect improv outside of rehearsal.
Anyway, improv people are my people so felt compelled to say hi!
Yes to sophophobia..... profound fear of the usual old people things like mah jong, bridge, canasta, rummy of all kinds.....break out in hives about anything that requires sitting and being nice. I am strangely attracted to the building trades, like learning how to weld, dealing with wires and hammering things. Who's with me?
I am definitely with you! I should be wiser, but here I am in my early eighties and can't stay away from anything wooden and hand crafted: designing , building and constructing all sorts of things, from garden structures to boat things... neither ladders nor power tools scare me. Only thing, I tire quickly these days and I compensate with naps.
Totally wish I could work on my house or car! I have physical problems with hands, wrists, arms, since my twenties. Can't do much of that, wish I could. Would love to weld!
As I've gotten older I haven't become averse to trying or learning new things. In some ways I think I'm actually more open to learning than when I was younger. When I was younger if I began to learn something new the question, "How can I commodify this?" was often floating around in my subconscious. And there were also many things that I put aside because I wasn't immediately "good enough" at them. If it didn't come almost naturally to me, I would put it aside. I didn't have the tolerance for trying, failing, imperfection, trying some more. I was so busy being busy, I couldn't take the time to actually learn something. Now that I'm older I'm still very busy. Maybe even busier. But I love learning! The thing about it is, I'm selective now. I don't feel I need to be an expert in everything. Or anything, even. Sometimes I learn a thing just for the fuck of it. Like loom knitting. I'm not particularly good at it. And the more I do it hasn't made me any better at it either. But here's the thing: I like it. I like learning new stitches even if they end up looking like mistakes in my hats and scarves. But doing it is relaxing and gives me something to keep my hands busy while I watch tv. So I keep knitting. Learning bits and bobs. Not to get better at it though. Just because I like it. And there's a real freedom in that.
I deeply belive that most of need to have one hobby that we are mediocre at. That we'll never improve a whole lot. That we just love doing for the doing, for the feeling or color of the materials ( wool, paper, clay, paint, whatever) , for the way it makes us feel inside.
Excellence, skill, achievement are wonderful. Maybe mediocrity is the white space.
Yes, I play guitar to entertain myself and I’m never going to be a performer who can play an instrument. I don’t mind acting or reading my writing or telling jokes- but the guitar is just for me to come home and strum out songs I love or pick out the melodies. I don’t want to be in a band, don’t want to play in front of others - even if I somehow became a virtuoso- it is my mediocre playing that distracts me from a chaotic world. It soothes me, gets the creative parts of the brain working and helps with eye hand coordination as well as understanding sheet music. I also paint for pleasure or to exorcise my demons. I crochet and knit and grow things because it is a different kind of joy it brings than writing. And crochet is literally learning by mistakes over and over, that you can undo and start over. But yes, I still have to cross through “It’s not perfect” valley sometimes to find the enjoyment of learning something new.
Hi love to learn new things, I’m 85, have three iPads a smart phone and an Apple Watch. My problem with learning new things is I honestly cannot understand written directions. I just can’t. I have to be shown that’s all I have to offer.
I'm with you on that the written instructions might as well be written in a foreign language.I think they do it on purpose to show how good they are, but was it not always so, lawyers have been writing in gobbaldy gook for years so that you , the punter, have to pay them to interpret the simplest of concepts. That's life we all have to exploit someone to live, sad fact.
I am a few months away from 70. I retired after 47 years in nursing- I just could not handle all the technology in health care and the lack of time for actually caring. In the last year I have started a small business ( very small) as a legacy life story coach- obtaining certifications in Guided Autobiography and Legacy Letter writing- I have needed new technology skills- How to record and transcribe stories, translating with AI apps because I now teach English for immigrants and I collect their amazing stories! And Book Wright to self publish legacy books. I can learn it- just takes me longer. I keep a notebook nearby to write detailed notes on the technology- click here, click there. As I struggle learning- I say to myself ‘neuroplasticity’ I am growing new brain cells!!!!
For me, it depends on the thing. I retired in December, after a long career in graphic and web design, partly because every day I was having to learn something new just to continue to do my job, and I got worn out. Things are changing so rapidly that the way you did things yesterday won't work today. Starting over every day or week or month is exhausting! Having said that, a year or so ago I started something completely new to me - art journaling - and one of the best things about it was that I had no idea how to do it and there is no pressure to be good at it! I'm finding my way and learning as I go and it's so fun! It's just for me, and it has changed my outlook and renewed my willingness to try new things. So, "no" to things I don't want to do and have no interest in learning; a resounding "yes!" to things I'm interested in and want to do! How wonderful to have a choice! I'm grateful for this time in my life, and for YouTube!
My goodness I wrote a comment and accidentally deleted it. ☹️ Here’s the short version: read this aloud to my 86 year ols mother who has dementia. She chuckled in all the right spots, so thanks for brightening our morning. I am an avid learner and insatiably curious. Learning to use power tools right now!
I great topic and one as a 70 something I have talked to my therapist about! One cannot deny one’s mental and physical decline with aging. We become a lot more careful and less likely to extend ourselves. QAs an aging athlete I’ve watched the abilities of my fellow ice skaters in their 70 s and 80 s really decline. The cool thing though is they’re still showing up even if they can’t learn new things! I was in a hospital lab recently that is now an all digital checkin! It was sad to see so many older people really struggling with technology and in a public place. I think the most important thing for me is just showing up for life, maybe learning less new things but still very interested in what is new. Which is why I love my younger friends!
Just wait until you go to McDonald's, a place we avoid anyway but we were on a trip and needed to eat. Those computer ordering devices are just gross. I keep thinking how many fingers have touched this screen. I think when you are older you like the interaction with other humans, and need it.
I'm resistant to learning new things that I have historically hated (technology, new social media platforms) because I feel like I'm getting old enough to not have to do shit I hate that's ruining civilization anyway. Is that a justification? Yes! Do I care? Not particularly! But I'm absolutely down with learning new things that bring me joy. If I could just find the time...
After 2 or three failed attempts (multiple lessons each time) I finally had to admit that my brain at 69 is not sufficiently plastic to learn sheep herding. My dog had no trouble. Other than that, my reluctance to learn software and other stuff depends entirely on whether or not I need it or find it useful or fun. I consider this being smarter as I age about where to spend my time. Maybe that’s because I have less of it to waste, as the song goes….
It depends on what the new thing consists of. I’m 64. In the past year I’ve started learning Tai Chi and how to teach English to someone who knows very little. But do I want to learn how to do my taxes without the help of an accountant? No way! Do I want to learn to bake my own bread? Nope.
Are there pills for Sophophoria? Write me a prescription immediately, please. Everything has so many steps. So many instructions. May I go lie down now, please? Thank you for this comic strip. Where does the local meeting for Sophophorics Anonymous meet? Oh, wait, I also hate groups, and meetings of any kind.
I love meetings, they give me an opportunity to talk to people. They all have a story to tell and the older the person the more interesting they have more to tell. It's amazing the diversity, talking to all people from all walks of life and from all over the world. Perhaps I'm just a nosy old git. But at my age why should I care. I've nothing to prove they either accept me for what I am or go off and talk to some other moron.
Nosey old git? Yep, I think I'm in that club.
If I didn’t know better I’d think you’re my long lost sister because yes to everything you said.
<3
😂
What is the opposite of sophophobia? I had to look it up and each time I googled different phrases, OCD kept popping up as the top definition.
I have the opposite problem: a compulsion to constantly try new things, and let me tell you, as I age it has become more exhausting each year not only for me but the people in my life. So my focus the last year has been to stay the course and stop allowing new things aka shiny objects to distract me.
I didn't think about this as an OCD thing, but now it's starting to make sense. Approaching 60 this year my brain and body are desperately trying to tell me "Please, stop. Please slow down and nourish what you have. You don't need anything. Everything you are looking for is on the other side of slowing down."
Interesting! That makes total sense.
I really like this comment. Those shiny things I thought I really needed in my late 50's and 60's are now sitting in my jewelry box. And my fabric compulsion. Thank God for pillow covers you can order for cheap online or my closets would be full of pillows. Variety without clutter because I love to change things up in the house. I'm 72, now the garden and growing things are my focus.The closets are full. I'm in the process of wearing all of my old teaching clothes while I garden just to get the use out of them lol. The shoes have been replaced by flip flops. I still can't bear to sit too long, I need to learn to sit quietly and relax. That is unbelievably hard to do.
What you need is to learn how to be lazy. Laziness gets such a bad rap, but I can't tell you the number of times it's saved me from doing stupid things.
Possibly undiagnosed ADHD. Presents differently in women and girls
Probably, but I'm accepting of myself at this age (finally)
Absolutely live your best life at any age. Late 60’s😊I find that I am loving new things and have no fear in learning. However procrastination is my super power…
This is the problem I have, too. I want to try everything! This is ADHD! Once I was diagnosed last year, and learned that this is a common symptom of ADHD in women, I felt so much better. I no longer feel bad about trying and, sometimes, stopping. I'm enjoying switching things up. It's been all about the language for me. I tell myself, hmm this is starting to feel samey so I'll put it aside for a while and do this other thing. It's good for my curiosity.
Starting to feel shamey...I love that! I'm working on completing the shitty first draft of my novel this year, and that's been the hardest part, staying the course even when it feels samey.
But I've also completed some monumental goals in my life, so intellectually I know that's where the gold is. Once I switched up my diet, became more conscious of how foods make me feel, and started paying more attention to my energy levels and different times of day, I realized how hard I'd been pushing for so long.
oooh... could I be OCD, too?
What do you think?
Keep going gal theres still plenty of fuel in your tank. It's not over until the last drop evapoartes out of your carburettor
HAHAHA your comment was the first thing I read this morning and it reminded me of the Little Engine that Could. I think I can, I think I can...
I know this post was supposed to be about fear but I think it’s so brave to post “beginner” work in a discipline that’s well outside of your comfort zone.
I started taking improv classes a year ago. I’m a very silly person and expected (stupidly) to be pretty good at it. Turns out, it’s fucking hard! I have bombed a million times. Sometimes I leave class wondering why I continue to do this. But I keep going back. I have no plans to do anything practical with it. The joy is in the learning. And every now and then I have a great night and it’s the best!
Thank you for saying that. And, yes, the joy is in the learning!
You are BRAVE
and I loved what you said about improv. Watching my 42 yr old daughter do it is hard enough for me. Admire you girl!!!!!!
So brave! 💜 brave creative real and true, makes my heart swoon
<3
Wow improv! That really takes staying in the moment. Good mind discipline. Hooray for you!
Thanks! I guess it’s a situation where the fun outweighs the fear.
Yes!
Yesss!! I took my first improv class nearly 5 years ago at 48. I was “bit” by about the third class when I let go in a scene and stopped thinking. Always trying to get to that magical place.
And!! I agree with everything you said here. It is hard! Five years in I still mostly feel like a beginner and prefer rehearsal to shows. Truthfully, shows are rarely perfect. That’s the beauty of this form. Like who cares? It’s usually gone in a breath when next scene starts.
I’m thinking of Sari sharing her imperfect comic and it’s making me feel braver to share my imperfect improv outside of rehearsal.
Anyway, improv people are my people so felt compelled to say hi!
I’m so glad if this has encouraged you!
Yes to sophophobia..... profound fear of the usual old people things like mah jong, bridge, canasta, rummy of all kinds.....break out in hives about anything that requires sitting and being nice. I am strangely attracted to the building trades, like learning how to weld, dealing with wires and hammering things. Who's with me?
I keep thinking about asking my contractor to show me how to do the siding and Iʻll take it from there...
I confess to being into wire sculpture. Wiring up odd ends of beach glass, silverware and beads. My weird little hangings.
I am definitely with you! I should be wiser, but here I am in my early eighties and can't stay away from anything wooden and hand crafted: designing , building and constructing all sorts of things, from garden structures to boat things... neither ladders nor power tools scare me. Only thing, I tire quickly these days and I compensate with naps.
Can you hear the sound of my applause??? You're my heroine.
Why not? Go for it.
These guys might have resources: https://oregontradeswomen.org/
and a friend of mine co-founded this: https://www.inclusiveblacksmiths.com/
Me. Are there classes in that?
Totally wish I could work on my house or car! I have physical problems with hands, wrists, arms, since my twenties. Can't do much of that, wish I could. Would love to weld!
As I've gotten older I haven't become averse to trying or learning new things. In some ways I think I'm actually more open to learning than when I was younger. When I was younger if I began to learn something new the question, "How can I commodify this?" was often floating around in my subconscious. And there were also many things that I put aside because I wasn't immediately "good enough" at them. If it didn't come almost naturally to me, I would put it aside. I didn't have the tolerance for trying, failing, imperfection, trying some more. I was so busy being busy, I couldn't take the time to actually learn something. Now that I'm older I'm still very busy. Maybe even busier. But I love learning! The thing about it is, I'm selective now. I don't feel I need to be an expert in everything. Or anything, even. Sometimes I learn a thing just for the fuck of it. Like loom knitting. I'm not particularly good at it. And the more I do it hasn't made me any better at it either. But here's the thing: I like it. I like learning new stitches even if they end up looking like mistakes in my hats and scarves. But doing it is relaxing and gives me something to keep my hands busy while I watch tv. So I keep knitting. Learning bits and bobs. Not to get better at it though. Just because I like it. And there's a real freedom in that.
I love this. <3
I deeply belive that most of need to have one hobby that we are mediocre at. That we'll never improve a whole lot. That we just love doing for the doing, for the feeling or color of the materials ( wool, paper, clay, paint, whatever) , for the way it makes us feel inside.
Excellence, skill, achievement are wonderful. Maybe mediocrity is the white space.
Yes, I play guitar to entertain myself and I’m never going to be a performer who can play an instrument. I don’t mind acting or reading my writing or telling jokes- but the guitar is just for me to come home and strum out songs I love or pick out the melodies. I don’t want to be in a band, don’t want to play in front of others - even if I somehow became a virtuoso- it is my mediocre playing that distracts me from a chaotic world. It soothes me, gets the creative parts of the brain working and helps with eye hand coordination as well as understanding sheet music. I also paint for pleasure or to exorcise my demons. I crochet and knit and grow things because it is a different kind of joy it brings than writing. And crochet is literally learning by mistakes over and over, that you can undo and start over. But yes, I still have to cross through “It’s not perfect” valley sometimes to find the enjoyment of learning something new.
"Cross through the 'it's not perfect' valley? Love that expression!
This is perfect! Yes, the question "how can I commodity this?" was a constant. I'm glad it's mostly gone.
Hi love to learn new things, I’m 85, have three iPads a smart phone and an Apple Watch. My problem with learning new things is I honestly cannot understand written directions. I just can’t. I have to be shown that’s all I have to offer.
Inspiring. I sometimes learn things by watching YouTube videos!
I'm with you on that the written instructions might as well be written in a foreign language.I think they do it on purpose to show how good they are, but was it not always so, lawyers have been writing in gobbaldy gook for years so that you , the punter, have to pay them to interpret the simplest of concepts. That's life we all have to exploit someone to live, sad fact.
I am a few months away from 70. I retired after 47 years in nursing- I just could not handle all the technology in health care and the lack of time for actually caring. In the last year I have started a small business ( very small) as a legacy life story coach- obtaining certifications in Guided Autobiography and Legacy Letter writing- I have needed new technology skills- How to record and transcribe stories, translating with AI apps because I now teach English for immigrants and I collect their amazing stories! And Book Wright to self publish legacy books. I can learn it- just takes me longer. I keep a notebook nearby to write detailed notes on the technology- click here, click there. As I struggle learning- I say to myself ‘neuroplasticity’ I am growing new brain cells!!!!
Cheers to neuroplasticity! And to career changes later in life.
ADMIRATION KUDOS !!!!!
Guided Autobiography and Legacy Letter writing? Never heard of it, but it certainly sounds interesting!
I'm not afraid to learn new things. I'm afraid to be FORCED to learn new things, typically by technology companies.
Yes, absolutely!
For me, it depends on the thing. I retired in December, after a long career in graphic and web design, partly because every day I was having to learn something new just to continue to do my job, and I got worn out. Things are changing so rapidly that the way you did things yesterday won't work today. Starting over every day or week or month is exhausting! Having said that, a year or so ago I started something completely new to me - art journaling - and one of the best things about it was that I had no idea how to do it and there is no pressure to be good at it! I'm finding my way and learning as I go and it's so fun! It's just for me, and it has changed my outlook and renewed my willingness to try new things. So, "no" to things I don't want to do and have no interest in learning; a resounding "yes!" to things I'm interested in and want to do! How wonderful to have a choice! I'm grateful for this time in my life, and for YouTube!
I love this, Sari! In fact, the new book I’m in the middle of writing, is all about this. Kudos for facing if, and creating an amazing comic!
I love that your new book is about that, Karen!!! And thank you!!
Sari, be sure to profile Karen when her book comes out! We need it.
I'll do something! Meanwhile, Karen has already taken The Oldster Magazine Questionnaire: https://oldster.substack.com/p/this-is-56-and-a-half-multi-hyphenate
My goodness I wrote a comment and accidentally deleted it. ☹️ Here’s the short version: read this aloud to my 86 year ols mother who has dementia. She chuckled in all the right spots, so thanks for brightening our morning. I am an avid learner and insatiably curious. Learning to use power tools right now!
I love that! Happy to help. Glad you and she enjoyed this.
I great topic and one as a 70 something I have talked to my therapist about! One cannot deny one’s mental and physical decline with aging. We become a lot more careful and less likely to extend ourselves. QAs an aging athlete I’ve watched the abilities of my fellow ice skaters in their 70 s and 80 s really decline. The cool thing though is they’re still showing up even if they can’t learn new things! I was in a hospital lab recently that is now an all digital checkin! It was sad to see so many older people really struggling with technology and in a public place. I think the most important thing for me is just showing up for life, maybe learning less new things but still very interested in what is new. Which is why I love my younger friends!
Just wait until you go to McDonald's, a place we avoid anyway but we were on a trip and needed to eat. Those computer ordering devices are just gross. I keep thinking how many fingers have touched this screen. I think when you are older you like the interaction with other humans, and need it.
Okay, the fact that you have brought this up in therapy means this is totally real. Lol.
Sari you brilliant human!! You have just unleashed a new career as a graphic novelist!!
<3
I'm resistant to learning new things that I have historically hated (technology, new social media platforms) because I feel like I'm getting old enough to not have to do shit I hate that's ruining civilization anyway. Is that a justification? Yes! Do I care? Not particularly! But I'm absolutely down with learning new things that bring me joy. If I could just find the time...
Yes, same.
After 2 or three failed attempts (multiple lessons each time) I finally had to admit that my brain at 69 is not sufficiently plastic to learn sheep herding. My dog had no trouble. Other than that, my reluctance to learn software and other stuff depends entirely on whether or not I need it or find it useful or fun. I consider this being smarter as I age about where to spend my time. Maybe that’s because I have less of it to waste, as the song goes….
Yes, we must be more selective as we get older. I did not expect that first sentence to end with...sheep herding. Love it.
It depends on what the new thing consists of. I’m 64. In the past year I’ve started learning Tai Chi and how to teach English to someone who knows very little. But do I want to learn how to do my taxes without the help of an accountant? No way! Do I want to learn to bake my own bread? Nope.
Ha ha. I get this.