42 Comments

Monica! What a great essay. And I share your lifelong dream of wanting to learn to tap dance! Iā€™m so inspired by you for going and doing it! Thank you for these beautiful words. Love you!

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Apr 17, 2023Liked by Sari Botton, Monica Drake

Oh my goodness this is full of all the magic -- thank you for sharing! Also how funny that I was just listening to Cheryl Strayed talk about how she wants to learn to tap-dance because she knows it will be a source of laughter. Just lovely. I'm fifty-two and it might be time for me, too... Shuffle-tap-swish...

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Apr 17, 2023Liked by Sari Botton, Monica Drake

Thank you, Monica, for sharing your story of recovery. I can hear your feet tap-tap-tapping and see the smile on your face as you practice, not just dance, but kindness to yourself. After so many years of being just an instrument to provide for others, it's joyful to hear that you have found the path to self-kindness.

I can personally relate to your story, as, I am sure, can many other women. May you always be an Absolute Beginner and somewhat of a cat lady. šŸ’œ

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Apr 17, 2023Liked by Sari Botton, Monica Drake

Bada Bing, Bada Boom, when we get the chance, say Yes to dance. BTW, teaching line dancing at 78 šŸ˜Ž

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Apr 17, 2023Liked by Sari Botton, Monica Drake

You make me want to find a tap class.

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Apr 17, 2023Ā·edited Apr 17, 2023Liked by Sari Botton, Monica Drake

What wonderful writing! Thank you for this beauty on a rainy Monday morning. I am reminded of how much I loved tap dancing as a child. And your description of the SNF is so damn accurate.

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Apr 17, 2023Liked by Sari Botton, Monica Drake

I loved how you rebuilt your spirit, just as your loved one was rebuilding their nerves. Beautiful piece.

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Apr 17, 2023Liked by Sari Botton, Monica Drake

I just wrote to our local college that has classes designed for seniors, to please add tap dancing to their class roster. Well done Monica Drake!

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Dang Monica! This one is a boooooomb! I'm an Oldster fan but hadn't seen this one. xoxo

PS: I started trying to write essay? Memoir? things again. And you are in some of them. The changing table. The green monster chair.

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Apr 21, 2023Liked by Sari Botton, Monica Drake

I like this! I remember us talking and how enthusiastic you were about tap. Now I'm extra nervous about making your students (me included) tap.

The tap chorus is so smart too, because it does the double work of transition, and it up-beats before the next heroic struggle.

See you in class!

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Apr 19, 2023Liked by Sari Botton, Monica Drake

Monica, what a powerful, poignant essay. You made me recall so vividly how family court judges police the midlife lady face as they award you the paltry sum (an average $185 a week) in child support. Smile for that... be grateful as your lawyer instructs you to always wear a white button down, black pants, and your hair in a low ponytail as though you've been nothing but a cater waiter for this marriage your whole life. Wow, lady. You've been through it. I am so glad you are finally dancing.

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Apr 17, 2023Ā·edited Apr 17, 2023Liked by Sari Botton, Monica Drake

Lovely, sad, and wise, this is a really first class piece of writing. I very much admire anyone who can find universal truths in quotidian events like these. Very pretty indeed.

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Apr 17, 2023Liked by Sari Botton, Monica Drake

Thank you for this, Monica! Not only is it a gorgeous and wrenching read, it gives voice to an important and underreported experience. I remember when you were going through this process and am amazed and grateful that you have rendered it in your shimmering prose. xo

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Apr 17, 2023Liked by Sari Botton, Monica Drake

I loved that very same tap class! But I did not want to drive so far, despite the amazing instructor and the fun (I was a real beginner too, and had had similar tap dreams since childhood). I have now discovered line dancing and am in heaven!

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Apr 17, 2023Liked by Sari Botton, Monica Drake

So much to love, as always, Monica!

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Apr 17, 2023Liked by Sari Botton, Monica Drake

Wow, congrats on your progress through the Dark Tunnel! I took tap classes back in theater school, and I always felt the rhythm of it as a grounding force. I liked slower, more moderate tapping, not the high-speed "42nd Street" kind that the real dancers could do. That stuff always looked scary and, I don't know... emotionally dis-regulating? In any case, the right kind of music and dance can heal, that I know for sure.

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