Again, how do you do it? I’m curious what the first glimmer idea was for this essay. Was it the arthritis, One Day, or the memory of your friend who died? All are woven together so beautifully. This is a perfect example of why “I don’t have anything to write about. My life isn’t that interesting” is full bullshit. You write here about love. What could be more universal, even if we experience it differently? Anyway, I’m becoming such a fan of yours. Thx for this
I can tell you exactly how I do it. It’s all craft. Please come to the next Zoom conversation on writing craft on March 23 from 3 to 4pm EST. If you email me, I can give you more information. And huge thanks for reading with insight and feeling. lauriestone@substack.com
I too, found my husband's family strange, in that they never seemed to yell at each other. Christmas was not a day full of ATMOSPHHERE, tension and all that other gut-twisting stuff. We would spend the whole day with them, and when we went home, I couldn't tell you what we'd talked about, other than there seemed to be a lot of talking and a lot of eating and a lot of pleasantness. I'd never come across anything like it.
There must be a German word for Richard's "retroactive sympathy" for his father - I absolutely love this term by the way - and we've just been talking about this very thing here, how it's not possible to really understand certain things about one's parents till much later in life. (Or perhaps it's because we've been so wrapped up in ourselves that we've been too selfish to reflect on such things at the time) Either way, this is another well crafted, thought-provoking, intelligent piece that I will re-read a few times. Love your writing Laurie, so much. I have to say too that I admire your honesty about Richard and your relationship: I'm relieved that there is "bitter laughter" and the not crying at "appropriate" times like a family member's death is just SO English. (I suspect tears seep out through the year at other strange, unguarded moments. Just an observation from my own English family.) We also enjoyed One Day but it took a day or two to get over the hangover of sadness it left me with especially since I grew up in the UK and that class struggle thing is *REAL* ... xo P.S. "Love as a boat and the rest of life as a sea of tears ..." Yes, 100%!!!
Not me. But my 97yo dad who I watched it with said it was depressing. If it didn't end the way it did, I would have had to watch like lots more episodes of them getting old and cranky like me. The couple show we streamed just before One Day, Normal People, at least ended after a few years when the characters still had all their teeth.
ha! i laughed out loud at richard’s describing his alien tears! 😭👽 the absent boat in a sea of tears, on the other hand…it’s a sad, lovely image. as is your last line, “he comes to look the way love always transforms the beloved.”
Great essay. I’m sitting here at the Beacon Theater waiting for a show to start that was supposed to start 15 minutes ago…. Grrr… I didn’t have any interest in watching One Day since I read the book and watched the feature film version with Anne Hathaway 10+ years ago but now I am curious how it plays out, and feels, as a series. And I don’t think I would have ever watched a show called ‘Resident Alien’ but now I can’t wait. Thank you!
"Harry falls in love with the feeling of love, and after that you don’t really care that much about the snake face and creepy extra pair of arms" That's some show that can do that : )
OMG, I was really shocked to read this: "I group his not crying with his not closing the lids on jars or the caps on toothpaste tubes and not really knowing the different between left and right." That is so my husband! He's very creative, an artist and a writer, and these things are just so blatantly him choosing not to do the expected thing, or the established thing...Why? Who knows. I love him dearly, even when he is being Mr. Fear-of-closure Man, and leaving the cap off the toothpaste.
We just started watching Resident Alien and Alan Tudyk's performance is a marvel. That blank-faced stare, lit suddenly by moments of understanding is so good. I've not seen him in anything before this, and now will have to go investigate his other work.
You cracked open a moment and there was a universe inside.💜
Thanks, love.
Again, how do you do it? I’m curious what the first glimmer idea was for this essay. Was it the arthritis, One Day, or the memory of your friend who died? All are woven together so beautifully. This is a perfect example of why “I don’t have anything to write about. My life isn’t that interesting” is full bullshit. You write here about love. What could be more universal, even if we experience it differently? Anyway, I’m becoming such a fan of yours. Thx for this
I can tell you exactly how I do it. It’s all craft. Please come to the next Zoom conversation on writing craft on March 23 from 3 to 4pm EST. If you email me, I can give you more information. And huge thanks for reading with insight and feeling. lauriestone@substack.com
I too, found my husband's family strange, in that they never seemed to yell at each other. Christmas was not a day full of ATMOSPHHERE, tension and all that other gut-twisting stuff. We would spend the whole day with them, and when we went home, I couldn't tell you what we'd talked about, other than there seemed to be a lot of talking and a lot of eating and a lot of pleasantness. I'd never come across anything like it.
I am 1/2 way though One Day and it is just such a delight.
I’m going to start watching it next week.
There must be a German word for Richard's "retroactive sympathy" for his father - I absolutely love this term by the way - and we've just been talking about this very thing here, how it's not possible to really understand certain things about one's parents till much later in life. (Or perhaps it's because we've been so wrapped up in ourselves that we've been too selfish to reflect on such things at the time) Either way, this is another well crafted, thought-provoking, intelligent piece that I will re-read a few times. Love your writing Laurie, so much. I have to say too that I admire your honesty about Richard and your relationship: I'm relieved that there is "bitter laughter" and the not crying at "appropriate" times like a family member's death is just SO English. (I suspect tears seep out through the year at other strange, unguarded moments. Just an observation from my own English family.) We also enjoyed One Day but it took a day or two to get over the hangover of sadness it left me with especially since I grew up in the UK and that class struggle thing is *REAL* ... xo P.S. "Love as a boat and the rest of life as a sea of tears ..." Yes, 100%!!!
I very much appreciate all you say here. Many thanks.
I cried too....
Not me. But my 97yo dad who I watched it with said it was depressing. If it didn't end the way it did, I would have had to watch like lots more episodes of them getting old and cranky like me. The couple show we streamed just before One Day, Normal People, at least ended after a few years when the characters still had all their teeth.
Beautifully written! And thanks for giving me a couple of shows to add to my list!
Thank you so much for this. Will be reading on repeat.
Oh, wonderful!
ha! i laughed out loud at richard’s describing his alien tears! 😭👽 the absent boat in a sea of tears, on the other hand…it’s a sad, lovely image. as is your last line, “he comes to look the way love always transforms the beloved.”
I meant the opposite for the last line! Love makes everyone beautiful, but I can see your interpretation. xxL
Great essay. I’m sitting here at the Beacon Theater waiting for a show to start that was supposed to start 15 minutes ago…. Grrr… I didn’t have any interest in watching One Day since I read the book and watched the feature film version with Anne Hathaway 10+ years ago but now I am curious how it plays out, and feels, as a series. And I don’t think I would have ever watched a show called ‘Resident Alien’ but now I can’t wait. Thank you!
Much food for thought here. Although I am not keen on aliens so won't go there but the rest of it .. yep.
"Harry falls in love with the feeling of love, and after that you don’t really care that much about the snake face and creepy extra pair of arms" That's some show that can do that : )
I love this. Now I have to watch those shows!
OMG, I was really shocked to read this: "I group his not crying with his not closing the lids on jars or the caps on toothpaste tubes and not really knowing the different between left and right." That is so my husband! He's very creative, an artist and a writer, and these things are just so blatantly him choosing not to do the expected thing, or the established thing...Why? Who knows. I love him dearly, even when he is being Mr. Fear-of-closure Man, and leaving the cap off the toothpaste.
I just keep thinking about this piece. Brava!
I like hearing that. Thanks.
This is a lovely piece, one of my favorites from you. And I felt exactly the same way about One Day. And I also have arthritis like my father....
Thanks!
We just started watching Resident Alien and Alan Tudyk's performance is a marvel. That blank-faced stare, lit suddenly by moments of understanding is so good. I've not seen him in anything before this, and now will have to go investigate his other work.