As I age I have become quiet. I used to be more opinionated. Now I really don’t share my opinions because I don’t really care about yours. It’s not a bitchy thing it’s self awareness and preservation.
Wonderful how you go from gardening to weeding (as in advice/comments/comeuppance).
I would add…I’d like to see more people be generous rather than stingy. To be receptive and open.
You, my dear, are a generous writer. You give and keep giving, thus an easy target for the needy to pierce and feel better about themselves.
I always start to read your posts with the intention to just check the beginning and then come back later to read, but I’m compelled to read all of it. Right then and there. This is because 1. You are a good writer. And 2. You are generous. You give your all. You are nakedly honest without cynicism.
This is rare, too rare.
Why can’t people be more be willing to receive? There’s a beast of takers out in the world and you’re not one of them.
«You who are younger than I ...» I do wonder how old you are, I am new here, just passing by. I am 87. Compliant? Not a chance. Angry? Can’t be bothered. For many decades I used anger only to fuel action. Which ocassionally means running my mouth, but not so much, it tends to be ineffective and a waste of my good energy. I have worked on behalf of women for 7 decades on 4 continents. Women Entrepreneurs. Ahhh the beauty of women in action!! And btw I have also raised 8 children. It has been and is a full life of deep concern and deep joy. This is the first time I have mentioned my age, it tends to eliminate me from being taken seriously, or at all! 😍
I so love this!! It reminded me of an interview Helen Mirren gave. She was asked if there was anything she wished she had done more of in her youth. Tell people to fuck off was her answer.
One of the best things about growing older (I'm 67) is that I seriously don't care about a lot of things. Sometimes I'm quiet, like @Linda K.
And I look at the groups I am in for various activities and I'm outside looking in most of the time.
And I find myself wishing I had a better wardrobe lately. I don't know where that's come from! But is that all it is? Wear a tunic top and clingy bike shorts and I'll fit in? hahahahah now I've made myself laugh about it. I'd rather spend my time reading and writing. And here we are :)
If I could write as well, I would have written this very thing. I'm a visual artist, but all of the thoughts about criticism apply. "If a piece has made you feel or think something, I like knowing that, too. If you don't enjoy what I post, you can skip my work the next time it scrolls along. I don't need to know you don't like something. Just go somewhere else to find pleasure." Yes, begone, enjoy your life! Thanks for this one.
YESYESYESYES! Oh, god, thank you. I feel released from… what? Responsibility for others opinions of me. And vindicated in my rage at their need to tell me what I’m doing wrong. It’s taken a long time to read another woman who’s decided she doesn’t give a fuck. There are some, and Laurie Stone is one of the best. I’m on my way, Laurie, and I’m grateful.
The algorithms brought me to this post and I am very happy they did. What a beautiful piece of writing, it packs so much in so few lines... Also, cheers to the freedom that it is to mostly not care about what others think - or even to decide if we do or don't.
I too notice that the older I get, the more impatient I get with the futilities of others - in a compassionate way. A way that says, "you'll get here, you'll see it too, but you have to see for yourself".
Wow. What a validating read! Besides being now what this culture categorizes as "old person" I am also Autistic. I've spent my life being criticized, ignored, or censured for not perceiving - and then reacting to - things the way neurotypical people believe are "normal," "reasonable," or "nice." Your take on the cultural demand that we (especially cis women and other AFAB's) respect and "learn from" others' uninvited criticisms is such a breath of fresh air. Thank you, thank you, thank you.
Wonderful piece of writing. Your metaphors rang clear as a bell into my brain. I have always been outspoken and it didn't bring me much. Some humans are so self involved that they have lost any ability to listen at all. Wait...people listen to the Dead? Are they mediums? Do they eat Cherries Garcia? I fantasize that your first drafts are written by Laurie Pebble as you polish them into a fine piece by Laurie Stone. xo
Jul 13, 2023·edited Jul 13, 2023Liked by Sari Botton, Laurie Stone
This was so enjoyable. The language. The insights. Just a pleasure for the eye and the ear. I love where you say there is no particular characteristic for a certain age. So true. Though easy for me to forget sometimes. I'm at the age where I've been asking myself: Am I who I think I am, or am I who people think I am based on my age, race, etc., etc. Of course, it's the former, but that doesn't mean those other things don't batter against me continually like waves against the hull of a ship. Maybe that's one of the takeaways that I try to remind myself of: that it's struggling against those outside forces that help to remind me who I am and what my intention is.
"The assumption being it's only your blighted ignorance that has walled you off from the correct understanding of the movie. Their understanding." Oh man! Can I ever identify with that attitude coming at me, my opinion is ignorant and if only I'd allow Mr. Podium sufficient time and oxygen I would come to understand and be embarrassed by my naïveté! And, I'd be grateful for the gift of Mr. Podium's enlightenment.
I shudder to admit that I was probably that arrogant in my youth! I love the idea of tacking a piece of writing to a wall and inviting readers to pass by. Thanks for this! And, by the way, the garden looks beautiful.
As I age I have become quiet. I used to be more opinionated. Now I really don’t share my opinions because I don’t really care about yours. It’s not a bitchy thing it’s self awareness and preservation.
Wonderful how you go from gardening to weeding (as in advice/comments/comeuppance).
I would add…I’d like to see more people be generous rather than stingy. To be receptive and open.
You, my dear, are a generous writer. You give and keep giving, thus an easy target for the needy to pierce and feel better about themselves.
I always start to read your posts with the intention to just check the beginning and then come back later to read, but I’m compelled to read all of it. Right then and there. This is because 1. You are a good writer. And 2. You are generous. You give your all. You are nakedly honest without cynicism.
This is rare, too rare.
Why can’t people be more be willing to receive? There’s a beast of takers out in the world and you’re not one of them.
Thank you for all you do.
And your garden is lovely.
«You who are younger than I ...» I do wonder how old you are, I am new here, just passing by. I am 87. Compliant? Not a chance. Angry? Can’t be bothered. For many decades I used anger only to fuel action. Which ocassionally means running my mouth, but not so much, it tends to be ineffective and a waste of my good energy. I have worked on behalf of women for 7 decades on 4 continents. Women Entrepreneurs. Ahhh the beauty of women in action!! And btw I have also raised 8 children. It has been and is a full life of deep concern and deep joy. This is the first time I have mentioned my age, it tends to eliminate me from being taken seriously, or at all! 😍
I so love this!! It reminded me of an interview Helen Mirren gave. She was asked if there was anything she wished she had done more of in her youth. Tell people to fuck off was her answer.
One of the best things about growing older (I'm 67) is that I seriously don't care about a lot of things. Sometimes I'm quiet, like @Linda K.
And I look at the groups I am in for various activities and I'm outside looking in most of the time.
And I find myself wishing I had a better wardrobe lately. I don't know where that's come from! But is that all it is? Wear a tunic top and clingy bike shorts and I'll fit in? hahahahah now I've made myself laugh about it. I'd rather spend my time reading and writing. And here we are :)
If I could write as well, I would have written this very thing. I'm a visual artist, but all of the thoughts about criticism apply. "If a piece has made you feel or think something, I like knowing that, too. If you don't enjoy what I post, you can skip my work the next time it scrolls along. I don't need to know you don't like something. Just go somewhere else to find pleasure." Yes, begone, enjoy your life! Thanks for this one.
YESYESYESYES! Oh, god, thank you. I feel released from… what? Responsibility for others opinions of me. And vindicated in my rage at their need to tell me what I’m doing wrong. It’s taken a long time to read another woman who’s decided she doesn’t give a fuck. There are some, and Laurie Stone is one of the best. I’m on my way, Laurie, and I’m grateful.
OMFG, this is good. Stellar. Fist-pumping me into my day! Even at 5:13 am. Xoxo
The algorithms brought me to this post and I am very happy they did. What a beautiful piece of writing, it packs so much in so few lines... Also, cheers to the freedom that it is to mostly not care about what others think - or even to decide if we do or don't.
I too notice that the older I get, the more impatient I get with the futilities of others - in a compassionate way. A way that says, "you'll get here, you'll see it too, but you have to see for yourself".
Thank you for sharing your work.
Maybe the small intestine. 🤷🏼♀️
I enjoy reading your stories so much. It makes me feel excited and joyful about getting older.
Wow. What a validating read! Besides being now what this culture categorizes as "old person" I am also Autistic. I've spent my life being criticized, ignored, or censured for not perceiving - and then reacting to - things the way neurotypical people believe are "normal," "reasonable," or "nice." Your take on the cultural demand that we (especially cis women and other AFAB's) respect and "learn from" others' uninvited criticisms is such a breath of fresh air. Thank you, thank you, thank you.
Wonderful piece of writing. Your metaphors rang clear as a bell into my brain. I have always been outspoken and it didn't bring me much. Some humans are so self involved that they have lost any ability to listen at all. Wait...people listen to the Dead? Are they mediums? Do they eat Cherries Garcia? I fantasize that your first drafts are written by Laurie Pebble as you polish them into a fine piece by Laurie Stone. xo
My comment is an action: I bought your book. Looking forward to spending more time with this remarkable voice.
This was so enjoyable. The language. The insights. Just a pleasure for the eye and the ear. I love where you say there is no particular characteristic for a certain age. So true. Though easy for me to forget sometimes. I'm at the age where I've been asking myself: Am I who I think I am, or am I who people think I am based on my age, race, etc., etc. Of course, it's the former, but that doesn't mean those other things don't batter against me continually like waves against the hull of a ship. Maybe that's one of the takeaways that I try to remind myself of: that it's struggling against those outside forces that help to remind me who I am and what my intention is.
"The assumption being it's only your blighted ignorance that has walled you off from the correct understanding of the movie. Their understanding." Oh man! Can I ever identify with that attitude coming at me, my opinion is ignorant and if only I'd allow Mr. Podium sufficient time and oxygen I would come to understand and be embarrassed by my naïveté! And, I'd be grateful for the gift of Mr. Podium's enlightenment.
I shudder to admit that I was probably that arrogant in my youth! I love the idea of tacking a piece of writing to a wall and inviting readers to pass by. Thanks for this! And, by the way, the garden looks beautiful.