Lani V. Cox addresses her 16-year-old self, a girl who underwent plastic surgery at her mother's urging and emerged determined to never let others dictated how she looked.
Lani, this beautiful piece left me in a puddle of tears. Yes, yes, it ends "happy," but your writing made me feel like I was going through this with you (super powerful). And "Yes" to NEVER letting others dictate how you look, act, write, speak, or express the wonder of "you" in this world. I loved reading your "Letter to My Younger Self#3." Thank you for your authenticity-stunning.
What a touching post I feel love for that young girl and sadness. This is such a reminder of the unintentional wounds we experienced when our mothers tried too hard to make us fit some beauty standard we were never going to fit. My mom's words and actions around food led me to an eating disorder. As a mother, I look back on some of the things I said and later regreted to my two girls. Do we say those things out of fear of what will happen if society rejects us because of our looks? It is a survival instinct or as you say, what our lizard brains tell us? Thanks for the reminder that there's room for us all.
Wow, I am really touched by your beautiful writing that made your journey, my journey as well! Thank you for being real in a world where people are always trying to change into the next best thing!
Lani this such a poignant and vulnerable essay. As someone whose mother gave her diet pills at 10(!!!) and also valued outward appearances above all, this really resonated with me. I want to reach through time and comfort your 16 year old self too.
I really like this piece. Struck quite a memory chord with me and will serve as a reminder to my granddaughter that she is beautiful and doesnt need to try to fit in. And by the way, I never realized that you had a chin implant, and I spent time with that teen-age girl, who had a wicked wit, didn’t pull punches, and always made me laugh or think!!!
what a wonderful piece! thank you Lani Cox. so relatable - mothers/daughters-the pressure to be what is determined as beautiful in society- and the beauty of growing into oneself. I applaud you!
As the daughter of a mother who tried to persuade me over the course of 20 years (like right into my 30s) to get my lips reduced by cosmetic surgery, I understand. I think my mom would still like me to do it, that’s the irony.
This is so beautiful and true. Thank you, Lani!
Lani, this beautiful piece left me in a puddle of tears. Yes, yes, it ends "happy," but your writing made me feel like I was going through this with you (super powerful). And "Yes" to NEVER letting others dictate how you look, act, write, speak, or express the wonder of "you" in this world. I loved reading your "Letter to My Younger Self#3." Thank you for your authenticity-stunning.
What a touching post I feel love for that young girl and sadness. This is such a reminder of the unintentional wounds we experienced when our mothers tried too hard to make us fit some beauty standard we were never going to fit. My mom's words and actions around food led me to an eating disorder. As a mother, I look back on some of the things I said and later regreted to my two girls. Do we say those things out of fear of what will happen if society rejects us because of our looks? It is a survival instinct or as you say, what our lizard brains tell us? Thanks for the reminder that there's room for us all.
Poignant reminder to honor everyone's natural physicality w/out judgment. Our culture doesn't make it easy.
I love this so much! Beautiful writing. And so true. I would love to read a book by this woman. As Brenda Ueland says, “Strength to your sword arm!”
Wow, I am really touched by your beautiful writing that made your journey, my journey as well! Thank you for being real in a world where people are always trying to change into the next best thing!
I so identify with this story. Pillow and all. Thank you for writing it.
Lani this such a poignant and vulnerable essay. As someone whose mother gave her diet pills at 10(!!!) and also valued outward appearances above all, this really resonated with me. I want to reach through time and comfort your 16 year old self too.
I really like this piece. Struck quite a memory chord with me and will serve as a reminder to my granddaughter that she is beautiful and doesnt need to try to fit in. And by the way, I never realized that you had a chin implant, and I spent time with that teen-age girl, who had a wicked wit, didn’t pull punches, and always made me laugh or think!!!
You are welcome. I get it. :) I am an author and I feel it's so important to be relatable. Love your voice.:)
"There’s room for all of us to be beautiful." Nice. thank you.
what a wonderful piece! thank you Lani Cox. so relatable - mothers/daughters-the pressure to be what is determined as beautiful in society- and the beauty of growing into oneself. I applaud you!
As the daughter of a mother who tried to persuade me over the course of 20 years (like right into my 30s) to get my lips reduced by cosmetic surgery, I understand. I think my mom would still like me to do it, that’s the irony.
Right on. Always be you. Positive energy ✊🏾☀️
Beautiful, chilling, beautiful. Such a great read - thank you.
All I can say is wow. Haunting story. Thank you for sharing it.