"It seems a waste to die in my sleep and for me and my body to miss the very last thing we do together." Oh my goodness this whole piece is the best way to think about this. Not hiding in the corners hoping Death doesn't see you but living your life, aware that Death is there but no one knows when or how it will arrive.
Love this as I love everything about Abigail and her writing. Her house, which I have visited, is old and clearly haunted, but I hope death stays out of it for many years so I can continue to reap the rewards of her intelligence and candor.
I loved her book "Still life" so much and sent it to my sisters. We are, all three of us, dealing with my 87 year old stepfathers decline (nursing home) and my mother's dementia at age 90. Its pretty tragic, with my mom not able to remember anything for more than ten minutes, which means every time she wakes from a nap she has no idea what's going on, where is her husband, etc. There are tears, there's anxiety. It scares the heck out of all of us. ("I sure hope this doesn't' happen to me" we say, like a mantra.) So whenever I read anything Abigail Thomas writes, I remember there is another way to age. To stay curious. To have an open mind. To be at one with life, with death, and even with dogs. She is an inspiration to me.
I think I'm in the process of writing the final chapters of my life. For the last years, I've thought long and hard about death. It's rarely something that happens to us but it is something we do which is a subtle distinction. I think the most thoughtful reflection on death can be found in Stephen Jenkinson’s book “Die Wise: a Manifesto for Sanity and Soul”. It's a great read for anyone who isn't going to live forever.
The line about missing the very last thing we do with our bodies... chilling and beautiful. What a lucky woman Abby Thomas is! Living her life with her dogs, with her family in proximity, and then also living her life aloud for all of us on the page. I am grateful.
To be awake or not to be awake when death calls: that's quite the thing to ponder. Though, I think, in the end, we won't be able to choose. We can contemplate what we'd choose though.
Oh Abby, how I love what you give to us, what you bring to the world, how you see it and how you share it. Thank you, Sari for inviting Abigail Thomas to Oldster and so to my morning inbox. A treat as welcome as my first cup of coffee.
This is an interesting way to think about death. Sometimes we forget how natural it is. We shouldn’t be afraid when our work here is done. Thanks for your post.
I am so grateful to all of you who responded to the piece, thank you, thank you.
😘
"It seems a waste to die in my sleep and for me and my body to miss the very last thing we do together." Oh my goodness this whole piece is the best way to think about this. Not hiding in the corners hoping Death doesn't see you but living your life, aware that Death is there but no one knows when or how it will arrive.
Love this as I love everything about Abigail and her writing. Her house, which I have visited, is old and clearly haunted, but I hope death stays out of it for many years so I can continue to reap the rewards of her intelligence and candor.
I think I need to start regularly checking my security Ring camera.
ah yes, at 87, Death is becomming a mental companion. I am healthy and well and wondeing when and how and where this soul will be next.
Plan the snacks. That might be fun. And would Death like a cocktail? Maybe he’ll have one too many and forget what he came for.
I loved her book "Still life" so much and sent it to my sisters. We are, all three of us, dealing with my 87 year old stepfathers decline (nursing home) and my mother's dementia at age 90. Its pretty tragic, with my mom not able to remember anything for more than ten minutes, which means every time she wakes from a nap she has no idea what's going on, where is her husband, etc. There are tears, there's anxiety. It scares the heck out of all of us. ("I sure hope this doesn't' happen to me" we say, like a mantra.) So whenever I read anything Abigail Thomas writes, I remember there is another way to age. To stay curious. To have an open mind. To be at one with life, with death, and even with dogs. She is an inspiration to me.
I think I'm in the process of writing the final chapters of my life. For the last years, I've thought long and hard about death. It's rarely something that happens to us but it is something we do which is a subtle distinction. I think the most thoughtful reflection on death can be found in Stephen Jenkinson’s book “Die Wise: a Manifesto for Sanity and Soul”. It's a great read for anyone who isn't going to live forever.
Thanks for the recommendation!
Hi John
I love his writing
In the death business
So fresh
Beautiful. Now in my nineties and looking at death as life's last great adventure, you inspire me.
The line about missing the very last thing we do with our bodies... chilling and beautiful. What a lucky woman Abby Thomas is! Living her life with her dogs, with her family in proximity, and then also living her life aloud for all of us on the page. I am grateful.
To be awake or not to be awake when death calls: that's quite the thing to ponder. Though, I think, in the end, we won't be able to choose. We can contemplate what we'd choose though.
Oh, how I love Abigail Thomas and all that she writes! I have read and continue to re-read everything of hers!
Beautiful. A useful and fun exercise…to consider, expect and play with the inevitable visitor. Thank you.
Oh Abby, how I love what you give to us, what you bring to the world, how you see it and how you share it. Thank you, Sari for inviting Abigail Thomas to Oldster and so to my morning inbox. A treat as welcome as my first cup of coffee.
Scary, real as dirt. I love and embody every word you write, Abigail. Capturing how all of us Oldster’s feel. It is right outside the door.
This is an interesting way to think about death. Sometimes we forget how natural it is. We shouldn’t be afraid when our work here is done. Thanks for your post.