Arthritis has made it so I can no longer wear the wooden-soled shoes I've long been obsessed with. What favorite things have you had to part with due to aging? An open thread...
Little by little, one by one, the losses mount! High heels, low heels, clogs. Contact lenses. Long hair. Short skirts, knee-length skirts, most all skirts. Dramatic makeup. My waist. Decolletage. Sleeveless shirts. Anything involving my knees. And so on!!
Clogs? Had to give those up 3 decades ago. Also heels of most any height over 1.75”? Bye. You too ballet flats, sorry, gotta go (with rare exceptions). Finding cool shoes other than sneakers has become a nightmare now (altho shoe shopping is still a blast in general). In my late 40’s I took to wearing maxi skirts in summer to hide my sensible sandals. Now in my 60’s I just don’t care-some sensibles actually look, well, sensible on me. Winter is easy-boots, boots and more boots. Summer & spring make me choose my outfit for the day based on whatever comfortable shoes I have that are not orthopedic looking, so too often that means capri leggings and a tunic top w/sneaks. Or a long dress with ‘travel sandals’.
News flash: your feet will change as you enter pre-menopause. They change again post menopause. I used to have high arches but no more. I used to be a 7, I am now an 8 on a good day, yet my foot still measures 6.5 (but wide widths just fall off my foot). 🤷🏼♀️ So every single pair of new shoes is a new adventure. A style that fit me 5 years ago is now uncomfortable. Btw, these are the things not talked about or taught about life post 50, so make a note and gird yourself. Ya gonna have to part with more than your periods.
These clogs--and your drawing--are charming! I don't have arthritis but since my 40s I started to give up on all heels and pointy shoes, underwired bras and any clothes that feel constricting (although, one day, while I was on set as a background actress for a period TV show, I had to wear a corset and three layers of petticoats--I almost passed out and had to leave the set!)
I've been so sad to give up my contact lenses, dark red lipstick, short anything, my single chin, seeing perfectly well with Progressives, and my body, you know, "well my ass and hips are wide, but at least I have strong legs and a pretty hourglass shape!" Complete with boobs that looked really great in an underwire bra. Now I'm shaped more like a Hershey's Kiss and the comfy bras I can get on barely hold my boobs up from my waist. :)
Never been able to wear them, too high an arch. On the flip side, I love a Chuck Taylor low top, but no arch support. Mostly I've had to part with my teeth, and replace them with paid for ones. ::sigh:: Could have been a lovely month on the coast of Italy instead...
I've had to give up my BELOVED Frye harness boots, the kind worn by biker gangs and rock stars. Starting when I was 18 had 4 pairs, one after the other, and I wore each one till it fell to bits. I used to wear them everywhere: onstage with my bands, on corporate gigs as a coach, once even as a bridesmaid with my tutu-like dress. They made me feel powerful and ready for anything, but my hips don't like them anymore, even with gellish inserts. For that matter, heels are pretty much a thing of the past, although I was recently reminded by a fashion friend about the "flatform", which is a shoe that looks like a heel but only cause one is carved out of the thick platform sole. I'm 5'9 and heels always put me above 6 feet, which I love, so I might yet give it a shot.
Ah Sari! Thank you for sharing. I'm a wannabe recovering clog whore. I've refused to give up my honey-leathered Danskos, deeming them practical and even good for my achy, inflamed body. But I took a hard tumble in them last spring right in my living room when I slipped on a piece of dog food my aging Dachshund may have strategically placed to take me down. Being 50 at the time, I kept thinking I could've broken a hip.
Now, nearing 52, I've had to bid adieu to my bed. I've always been a terrible sleeper, even as a kid. But, now in my 50s and dealing with menopause and a host of other maladies, I can't sleep. Not even with medications. The heavy-hitters will knock me out for a few hours, but leave me in such a haze the next day I can't function. I bounce from couch to chair to futon most nights, a sweaty, frustrated heap of a woman. I hope this parting is only temporary, but saying goodbye to the cozy sanctuary of my bed has been most distressing.
I find my vintage clothes so uncomfortable. I used to almost always wear vintage but now I'm so aware of how constricting they are. I'm all about athletic wear these days. Clothes that move with me, that are cooling, that don't smell, don't need ironing etc
I stopped wearing high heels years ago, but I saved a few that I view as art objects. Like you, I wore Olaf Daughters clogs in the 70s and those platform huaraches that were the thing to have in 1978. I made the same mistake a few years ago, buying a cute pair of clogs with an ankle strap. Definitely do not work on my feet. Ditto all flat shoes without arches. On the plus side, I have found that the foot pain I had has been reduced dramatically with Pilates exercises that build muscles in the feet. A game changer.
Because I’m a stubborn little cuss, I hauled my neon green-and-blue rollerblades every place I moved over the last decade and a half, even though I hadn’t used them in ages. Finally, last year I looked at them at then myself in the mirror and said, “You’d break yer danged neck.” Somehow I kept thinking I’d skate again. But one day I knew I wouldn’t. I miss speed. I miss feeling easy in my body. Ah, well. I donated them to a thrift store that supports activities for disadvantaged youth. Hoping someone else gets the same kind of joy I did.
Many of my people are obsessive clog wearers and the swear by Danskos, which generally have backs that at least help with the shuffling problem. I tried to love them, but they provided no ankle support so I literally fell off of them too many times moving fast.
In terms of giving things up, there's heels, of course. Even a wide, platform heel just makes my back hurt. I also gave up sleeping naked because I would wake up with sweat trickling between my breasts and it just made me feel icky. I no longer will wear anything fitted that doesn't have a tremendous amount of give to it. Anything corseted or otherwise fitted with no stretch can f*!k right off.
I do sometimes mourn the bared midriff (and my 15-year old is a fan, so I think about it more than you might imagine), but those days are definitely over.
Adding to the list of those who haven't worn heels for years--still have a few kitten heels in my closet but haven't put them on since...? The before times. Have gently moved toward more comfy underwire-less bras. But jeans, or any kind of pants with zipper and belt loops? Pretty much a no until the rare random day I'm in a jeans mood. My uniform has pretty much become leggings and tunic/dress with bright scarves or jewelry to fancy things up. I'm feeling part one-trick pony and part this-is-me-take-it-or-leave-it. Have to say, though, that at 68, I'm relieved to at least not look like what I thought this age would be decades ago. Still kicking!
I'm a clog lover too. I just got birkenstock professional clogs and my back, knees and feet are surprisingly thrilled. I even have done some 12 hour standing shifts. These are rubber. Not the old fashioned suede
After retiring from the UK to the eastern Australian hinterland and years of wearing heels in my university role, I just love wearing no shoes at all, all year round. Daytime shoes outside are Birkenstock thongs and once a week to church I wear Hush Puppy sandals. Supermarket shopping here is interesting…many adults and most little kids are shoeless too. Many people in these parts live an active life to their 90s. I wonder if going shoeless is the key?
Little by little, one by one, the losses mount! High heels, low heels, clogs. Contact lenses. Long hair. Short skirts, knee-length skirts, most all skirts. Dramatic makeup. My waist. Decolletage. Sleeveless shirts. Anything involving my knees. And so on!!
Clogs? Had to give those up 3 decades ago. Also heels of most any height over 1.75”? Bye. You too ballet flats, sorry, gotta go (with rare exceptions). Finding cool shoes other than sneakers has become a nightmare now (altho shoe shopping is still a blast in general). In my late 40’s I took to wearing maxi skirts in summer to hide my sensible sandals. Now in my 60’s I just don’t care-some sensibles actually look, well, sensible on me. Winter is easy-boots, boots and more boots. Summer & spring make me choose my outfit for the day based on whatever comfortable shoes I have that are not orthopedic looking, so too often that means capri leggings and a tunic top w/sneaks. Or a long dress with ‘travel sandals’.
News flash: your feet will change as you enter pre-menopause. They change again post menopause. I used to have high arches but no more. I used to be a 7, I am now an 8 on a good day, yet my foot still measures 6.5 (but wide widths just fall off my foot). 🤷🏼♀️ So every single pair of new shoes is a new adventure. A style that fit me 5 years ago is now uncomfortable. Btw, these are the things not talked about or taught about life post 50, so make a note and gird yourself. Ya gonna have to part with more than your periods.
These clogs--and your drawing--are charming! I don't have arthritis but since my 40s I started to give up on all heels and pointy shoes, underwired bras and any clothes that feel constricting (although, one day, while I was on set as a background actress for a period TV show, I had to wear a corset and three layers of petticoats--I almost passed out and had to leave the set!)
My vagina! Like a vestigial organ.
I've been so sad to give up my contact lenses, dark red lipstick, short anything, my single chin, seeing perfectly well with Progressives, and my body, you know, "well my ass and hips are wide, but at least I have strong legs and a pretty hourglass shape!" Complete with boobs that looked really great in an underwire bra. Now I'm shaped more like a Hershey's Kiss and the comfy bras I can get on barely hold my boobs up from my waist. :)
Never been able to wear them, too high an arch. On the flip side, I love a Chuck Taylor low top, but no arch support. Mostly I've had to part with my teeth, and replace them with paid for ones. ::sigh:: Could have been a lovely month on the coast of Italy instead...
I've had to give up my BELOVED Frye harness boots, the kind worn by biker gangs and rock stars. Starting when I was 18 had 4 pairs, one after the other, and I wore each one till it fell to bits. I used to wear them everywhere: onstage with my bands, on corporate gigs as a coach, once even as a bridesmaid with my tutu-like dress. They made me feel powerful and ready for anything, but my hips don't like them anymore, even with gellish inserts. For that matter, heels are pretty much a thing of the past, although I was recently reminded by a fashion friend about the "flatform", which is a shoe that looks like a heel but only cause one is carved out of the thick platform sole. I'm 5'9 and heels always put me above 6 feet, which I love, so I might yet give it a shot.
Ah Sari! Thank you for sharing. I'm a wannabe recovering clog whore. I've refused to give up my honey-leathered Danskos, deeming them practical and even good for my achy, inflamed body. But I took a hard tumble in them last spring right in my living room when I slipped on a piece of dog food my aging Dachshund may have strategically placed to take me down. Being 50 at the time, I kept thinking I could've broken a hip.
Now, nearing 52, I've had to bid adieu to my bed. I've always been a terrible sleeper, even as a kid. But, now in my 50s and dealing with menopause and a host of other maladies, I can't sleep. Not even with medications. The heavy-hitters will knock me out for a few hours, but leave me in such a haze the next day I can't function. I bounce from couch to chair to futon most nights, a sweaty, frustrated heap of a woman. I hope this parting is only temporary, but saying goodbye to the cozy sanctuary of my bed has been most distressing.
Love you work here. Take good care.
SCB
I find my vintage clothes so uncomfortable. I used to almost always wear vintage but now I'm so aware of how constricting they are. I'm all about athletic wear these days. Clothes that move with me, that are cooling, that don't smell, don't need ironing etc
I stopped wearing high heels years ago, but I saved a few that I view as art objects. Like you, I wore Olaf Daughters clogs in the 70s and those platform huaraches that were the thing to have in 1978. I made the same mistake a few years ago, buying a cute pair of clogs with an ankle strap. Definitely do not work on my feet. Ditto all flat shoes without arches. On the plus side, I have found that the foot pain I had has been reduced dramatically with Pilates exercises that build muscles in the feet. A game changer.
Western boots, with beautiful designs and pointy toes-giving them up was so hard but my toes betrayed me! Stupid hammer toes!
Because I’m a stubborn little cuss, I hauled my neon green-and-blue rollerblades every place I moved over the last decade and a half, even though I hadn’t used them in ages. Finally, last year I looked at them at then myself in the mirror and said, “You’d break yer danged neck.” Somehow I kept thinking I’d skate again. But one day I knew I wouldn’t. I miss speed. I miss feeling easy in my body. Ah, well. I donated them to a thrift store that supports activities for disadvantaged youth. Hoping someone else gets the same kind of joy I did.
Many of my people are obsessive clog wearers and the swear by Danskos, which generally have backs that at least help with the shuffling problem. I tried to love them, but they provided no ankle support so I literally fell off of them too many times moving fast.
In terms of giving things up, there's heels, of course. Even a wide, platform heel just makes my back hurt. I also gave up sleeping naked because I would wake up with sweat trickling between my breasts and it just made me feel icky. I no longer will wear anything fitted that doesn't have a tremendous amount of give to it. Anything corseted or otherwise fitted with no stretch can f*!k right off.
I do sometimes mourn the bared midriff (and my 15-year old is a fan, so I think about it more than you might imagine), but those days are definitely over.
Adding to the list of those who haven't worn heels for years--still have a few kitten heels in my closet but haven't put them on since...? The before times. Have gently moved toward more comfy underwire-less bras. But jeans, or any kind of pants with zipper and belt loops? Pretty much a no until the rare random day I'm in a jeans mood. My uniform has pretty much become leggings and tunic/dress with bright scarves or jewelry to fancy things up. I'm feeling part one-trick pony and part this-is-me-take-it-or-leave-it. Have to say, though, that at 68, I'm relieved to at least not look like what I thought this age would be decades ago. Still kicking!
I'm a clog lover too. I just got birkenstock professional clogs and my back, knees and feet are surprisingly thrilled. I even have done some 12 hour standing shifts. These are rubber. Not the old fashioned suede
After retiring from the UK to the eastern Australian hinterland and years of wearing heels in my university role, I just love wearing no shoes at all, all year round. Daytime shoes outside are Birkenstock thongs and once a week to church I wear Hush Puppy sandals. Supermarket shopping here is interesting…many adults and most little kids are shoeless too. Many people in these parts live an active life to their 90s. I wonder if going shoeless is the key?