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Asha Sanaker's avatar

I so appreciate, Maureen, how you didn't tie everything up neatly with a bow. As if there is some point we can get to where the difficulties of who our parents are, or were, don't matter anymore. They always matter. At least they always matter to me. We just get on with things anyway, as you are. Thanks for this. ♥

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Sydney Lea's avatar

Maureen: This touched me in so many ways-- moved me to anger, amusement, and empathy, even for that difficult father. I had an unusual but similar situation when my beloved Dad died at 56. In this case, typical gender roles were reversed. My mother was the all-commanding figure, my father the gentle (enabling) spouse. When my Dad dropped dead, she assured me that I needn't worry: she wouldn't cry at his funeral. The tacit message was, "You'd better not, either." Of course, I couldn't not cry. A ton.

I have long since forgiven my mom: gender discrimination had discouraged this brilliant lady early on, and booze had taken over early too. Thank you for your account!

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